Not Very Intelligent Design

Ten amazing things concerning this book:

The intelligent designer created reading glasses so that all humans could read the kindle version of this audiobook.
Humans need haircuts. Cat hair stops growing at exactly the right length.
Humans have butt crack hair because the intelligent designer decided that your bottom would be too hygienic and too easy to clean without it.
Humans sometimes choke to death. Dolphins don't. They have a separate breathing tube.
Humans who seriously believe in creation theory will not enjoy this book.
The bit in this book about an amputee soldier who loses his second hand in a blender whilst on a bender in Bali may contain traces of fiction.
The bit about a poop in a public pool that leads to mass murder may not be completely true.
If you think God's on your side, don't read this book.
If you think God's on Trump's side, you probably won't be able to.
Ninety-nine percent of this book has absolutely nothing to do with Trump. Thank God for that.