Li only realised who her parents were when she was five. The fifth of eight children to migrants from China, Li grew up in her family's shophouse in Kuala Lumpur, Malaya. Generally ignored by her elders, but regularly beaten and cursed by her guardian, Li still became infused with her father's longing to return to Shanghai, the home he left only reluctantly.
After an often-lonely childhood, Li had happy times at high school. She found the loving paternal figure she craved in the father of her future husband, only to lose him after a few years. Li's marriage was at times blighted by her relationship with her mother-in-law. Yet, Li remained loyal to her husband, raising four children while gaining university degrees in Singapore and Sydney.
Now in her early eighties, Li reflects on her life, from the early years of physical abuse and psychological deprivation, through the joys and trials of marriage, travel, racism, depression, and her hopes for her grandchildren's generation.
Li offers her story to give voice to events experienced by many but seldom discussed. She sounds a warning to immigrants who visualise a new, untroubled life, and suggests patience to host nations, where the traumas of new residents might not be known or understood.
Finally, Li's self-exploration enables her to recognise why she has always felt such a connection to China, a country she finally visited at the age of 45.
